The Puppyfication of America

I recently adopted a new puppy, a toy poodle which I have named Rufus. Rufus is the most adorable puppy, playful, warmhearted, and already my best friend. Even though I am in love with my puppy I’ve realized that he is really derpy and possibly not the smartest puppy in the pound. Looking at my toy poodle it is hard to imagine that he is a descendant of the gray wolf. Dogs were domesticated from wolves some 15,000 years ago. Wild wolves are great hunters, intelligent beasts, designed my nature to survived in the toughest environments. My puppy wouldn’t last a week without his kibble ‘n bits. But it’s not my puppy’s fault, the whole process of domestication makes animals dumber than their wild counterparts. Domestication de-evolves animals in an unnatural selective way into cute puppies, tasty beef, and dumb Americans.

The process of puppyfication, or domestication, does not only occur on animals whose traits we select and breed for, it is also affecting the American populace. American sensibilities and ideals are themselves changing by external factors such as our current education system and political correctness which is making Americans dumber. The United States was founded on the ideals of personal freedoms and liberties but now you can’t go visit grandma in Idaho without having your balls manhandled or your butt crack scanned using radiation. After the Civil War, the United States was by and large a pacifist nation and since World War II we haven’t seen a decade without being involved in a military conflict. During the Cold War, we were told that the communists are evil because they spy on their neighbors and now the Department of Homeland Security uses that same tactic in their “If you see something, say something” program. For generations, the American Dream was that if you work hard enough you can achieve anything, now it seems that the American Dream has been deferred to possibly sending your kids to college and put a little away for retirement.

I don’t have a time machine, but I can guarantee you that if we could travel back in time and talk to the founding fathers and describe to them what American has become that they would have surrendered their fight for independence because American independence is fast becoming a myth. George Washington would never have approved a Department of Homeland Security or Transportation Security Agency. Thomas Jefferson would not have condoned the Patriot Act or the Nation Defense Authorization Act. Abraham Lincoln would not have kept America at war and the Guantanamo Bay Detention Camp opened for this long. The whole of the American Civil War lasted for four years, we’ve been in the current War on Terror for over ten years, and War of Drugs for over twenty-five years. We have active and covert military campaigns and war theaters across the Muslim world including Iraq, Afghanistan, Somalia, Pakistan, Iran, Syria, and others. Teddy Roosevelt would not install surveillance equipment in secret rooms in telecommunication companies, place GPS tracking devices in peoples cars, grant millions of wiretapping requests, and sweep civil liberties under the rug. Dwight Eisenhower would not have made a complicit deal with the military-industrial-financial complex and bail out banks instead of people, and police the population with military-grade drones.

The American public is trading in personal liberties for what the government says is public security. As this change is in process, the American people don’t seem to care. In fact, it seems that we the people care more about American Idol than presidential elections.

I don’t know when the puppyfication, or the homeland domestication, of the American people began. I can also see the difference between the American frontiers people that at great odds and personal danger fought tyranny and settled this country and modern American that settles to have his butt crack radiated when visiting grandma. Just like my toy poodle is breed to be cute and adorable may not resemble it’s wolves ancestors, so do modern Americans grilling in the backyard with drones flying overhead do not resemble the revolutionary heroes that founded this nation.

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