Retweet January 2012

Here I am reblogging some retweets for the past month that broken down by subject matter. Some of these tweets also cover events that occurred in January 2012 such as the ongoing Occupy Wall Street, and the continuing revolutions in the Middle East. If you like to follow along, befriend xwoop and lolprez and I’ll be sure to follow back.


  • Obama’s Campaign: If you don’t vote for Obama, you must be racist.
  • Obama has more skeletons in his closet than raincoats.
  • The State of the Union sounded a lot like The State of the Complaining.
  • Being president doesn’t make you sultan.

Got Gov?

  • The US is not building a Big Brother surveillance program, it is building a Big Nanny surveillance program.
  • Wow.. I thought the US Air Force was going to bomb the AFC Championship game. #militarization #sports
  • Instead of a war on terror why not declare war on cancer? Instead of radio active naked body scanners at airports, why not cancer detecting mammograms instead?
  • The police are sworn to protect the status quo.
  • The RIAA is afraid that someone is going to pirate a $10 CD that they are pirating our rights and freedoms.
  • Trust no politician!


  • Network news hate to report the news, they want I make news… That’s why they also produce political polls.
  • Half of what you see or read on the news is driven by PR.
  • Hipsters are an invented peoples.
  • Death to all hipsters.
  • Not surprising the first examples of use of terrorism in history comes from the middle east, see Zealotry on Wikipedia.
  • The revolution will be liked on Facebook.


  • Society made me do it.
  • Hormones made me do it.
  • Coincidence is not a conspiracy.
  • Paula Deen is the embodiment of what is wrong with America.
  • Paula Deen doesn’t want to be buried or cremated. Paula Deen wants to e deep fried.
  • Watching sport games all day is the worst activity a person can do for his health.

In Da Future

  • In the future, store surveillance cameras will automatically check you in on Facebook and Foursquare and the National Location Database.
  • In the future, the FBI and NSA will have a REST API that all app developers have to include in their apps to monitor behavior and usage.
  • In the future, to search on Google you will have to use a google account with a verified name.
  • In the future, everything will be illegal unless you pay the fee for a permit.

KimJongNumberUn Will Destroy All The Things

Kim Jong-Un has been trending on Twitter since he became the head of the government of North Korea with the passing of his father, the Kim Jong-Il. Most recently, Kim Jong-Un has been trending because of rumors of his death have gone viral on social networking sites. As it’s customary, for every trending topic there must be a satire account on Twitter and so there is a fake Kim Jong-Un account @KimJongNumberUn. Event though the @KimJonNumberUn account is not real, I sounds real enough. Here are a few choice tweets from @KimJongNumberUn.

  • I could not sleep last night worrying about one of those four madmen getting nuclear weapons. #cnndebate #flprimary
  • Still four of them? What was the point of the last debate if no one was executed? #cnndebate
  • If the Arizona governor stuck her finger in my face, you know what I’d call that? A free snack.
  • My critics say I’m out of touch. But if that’s true, how come I have so many friends on MySpace? #BOOM
  • Here’s my state of the union: it’s fuckin dope. Peace out yall.
  • In case you’re wondering where Facebook’s privacy policy came from, they stole it from the N Korean government. #PROPS
  • Once a year I, too, gather all my political opponents in one room, to shoot them. #SOTU
  • Sending people to a crowded freezing place and making them watch indie films is one form of torture we haven’t tried.
  • The negative ads Americans use to destroy other politicians seem crazily expensive compared to our system of poisoning.
  • So the Republican leader pays no taxes and gets rich on the labor of others? American bastards have stolen our system.
  • Dope news, y’all – just decided that our national bird will be Angry.
  • The US claims it stands for human rights, and yet it banned Four Loko. #hypocrisy
  • Does my population make me look fat?
  • I have 20,000 followers after only 7 days. Not bad for a dude who banned the Internet. #pimpin
  • At moments like this it terrifies me that the US has nuclear weapons. #GOPDebate
  • Yall played this dope new game Farmville? Imaginary farms grow imaginary food. Just like North Korea. #sofaking #dope
  • Willing to trade nuclear fuel rod for XBox 360 in good condition. IM me on MySpace.

What You Tweet Will Be Held Against You

Two things that most governments don’t get, sarcasm and how the internet works. If you asked me what countries routinely monitor Facebook and Twitter, I would have replied repressive and corrupt governments such as China or Belarus. But recent events reveal that the United States and other first world nations are actively monitoring for dissident not social networking sites.

The FBI is said to be looking to monitor all public information posted on social networking sites such as Facebook and Twitter. The FBI put out a request for proposal on a social networking and monitoring application. You have the right to ignore a friend request from the FBI.

Maybe the FBI is lagging behind social media compared to other agencies because already shortly after news broke out about the deportation of two British tourists after they tweeted the following: Free this week, for quick gossip/prep before I go and destroy America?

Tweeting that you going to do anything not nice to America will get you deported and barred from entering the country again. I don’t doubt that in the future, as part of the citizen naturalization process, a social media background check will be conducted before you can be made a citizen.

South Korea has detained a South Korean citizen for posting sarcastic comments and images on Twitter about North Korea and maybe charged for retweeting North Korean propaganda under South Korea’s National Security Law. So tweeting, retweeting, and following a North Korean organization is a national security violation in South Korea!?